Chef's Kiss Ch. 9 (Fate/Grand Order) (Patreon)

A/N: A summoning takes place and Shirou defaults to what he does best.

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This time around, Shirou gets to watch the summoning as an outsider. It looks pretty flashy, with lines of runic script in the air coalescing around Rin and the center of the summoning chamber. Until finally, a Servant begins to coalesce, summoned by the FATE System… but also by Rin herself.

After seeing the Servant that he got, Shirou couldn’t help but be curious. Just who would Rin manage to pull from the Throne of Heroes? He was a little worried, but also trusted the magus to be able to handle whatever they tried to throw at her. Rin was very capable, after all, and like him she’d been a Master in a Holy Grail War before. Unlike him, she’d also prepared for being a Master ahead of time, rather than being thrown in the deep end and forced to either sink or swim.

Even still… as the light fades away and Rin’s new Servant stands before them all, Shirou can’t help but stare. His mouth is open as well, and he knows its unseemly but… this wasn’t what he expected at all. After all, there were so many other options for Rin to summon. Why on earth… no, rather HOW on Earth had she summoned herself?!

Standing before them all with blonde hair and a fancy but also scandalous get-up, is Rin Tohsaka. She radiates the power of a Servant to be fair, but at the same time… She’s definitely Rin. Rin with her eyes closed to be exact. Holding a hand up, as if to forestall any objections or indeed any words at all, the blonde Rin with her eyes closed breathes in deeply.

“Servant. Lancer-class. Ereshkigal, Mistress of the Underworld. I have come in answer to your summons. Be grateful. I don’t really like helping any one person exclusively, especially mortals, but I’ll help you out because you summoned me.”

Yeah, that haughty attitude was certainly very Rin-like. Except instead, the blonde copycat had called herself Ereshkigal. Shirou finally closes his mouth as he just stares at the Servant that Rin has summoned on abject confusion. Meanwhile, silence falls over the chamber as Rin stares as well, though she doesn’t look nearly as confused… rather, Rin looks angry. She looks irate.

Finally, in the face of the silence that she’s received, Ereshkigal finally opens her eyes.

“Hey! Why are you so quiet, huh?! I’ll have you know-!”

And then she finally makes eye contact with her summoner and goes abruptly still. Staring at Rin, her new Master, the self-proclaimed Mistress of the Underworld gapes, looking completely caught off guard.

“W-Wha… y-you?! Why are you summoning me?!”

Rather than answer the blonde doppelganger, Rin Tohsaka scowls angrily and crosses her arms over her chest, looking over at a surprised Dr. Roman.

“Acting Director. Explain. Now.”

Despite his seniority and the fact that he’s technically their superior, Rin’s tone brooks no argument… and thankfully, Roman doesn’t try to make one. Instead, the good doctor rubs the back of his head sheepishly as he consults his monitors.

“… The readings paint an interesting picture to say the least. It would seem that you have, uh… managed to summon the Sumerian Goddess of the Underworld. However, the FATE System isn’t really made to handle full-blown divine spirits such as Ereshkigal. So instead, FATE scans the whole of human history looking for a compatible host and then pairs them up with the divine spirit being summoned. It would seem Ereshkigal’s most compatible host was you… Rin Tohsaka.”

Rin stiffens and Shirou does the same in the background. Damn it all. They’d very specifically not completely confided in Dr. Roman who they were just yet. That was the whole plan, to keep things close to their chest and only read Ritsuka in on their situation. However, now that the Acting Director of Chaldea has a copy of Rin right in front of him and the readings are telling him that Ereshkigal’s host and Rin are the same person, Rin’s personal Mystic Code is worthless. It doesn’t matter that he’s not actually seeing two Rin Tohsaka right now. He’s seeing it in the data on his monitors.

… At the same time, it was nice of him to let them know that he knew, Shirou supposed. And while Rin does bristle a little bit in anger, she doesn’t try to bite Dr. Roman’s head off at least. That’s a relief. On the other hand, she doesn’t look all that happy as she gazes at Ereshkigal, who still looks gobsmacked that she’s staring at another version of her host.

“So you’re saying that out of everyone, she body-jacked a version of me in order to be here, is that it?”

As Dr. Roman sheepishly nods, Ereshkigal sputters.

“B-Body-jacked?! Excuse you! I’ll have you know that my host gave their consent! Maybe not to me personally, but they were fully okay with this!”

Shirou blinks, not quite parsing that statement. A version of Rin gave her consent to being possessed by a divine spirit, but she didn’t give her consent directly to Ereshkigal? What did that even mean?

Unfortunately, Rin doesn’t seem as curious about that statement as he is. Instead, she can’t help but look Ereshkigal up and down with a derisive scoff.

“What are you even wearing? Your panties are just… out in the open!”

Ereshkigal squawks as she looks down at herself. Indeed, the black dress and red cloak combo she’s wearing are quite cute… but for some reason the skirt of her black dress is pinned up to a golden belt across her waist, showing off her golden and navy blue panties for everyone to see.

“T-This is my formal dress! This is what the Mistress of the Underworld wears EVERY day! I-I look very dignified like this!”

Rin scoffs again, shaking her head.

“You look like a street walker.”

Any poise or grace that the blonde copycat was displaying vanishes as she sputters and squawks and waves her hands. Shirou watches on in a strange mixture of amusement and bemusement. On the one hand, he can definitely see why Rin was the most compatible host for the Sumerian Goddess of the Underworld. On the other hand… trust Rin to know exactly how best to bully herself at the end of the day…

As Rin ruthlessly berates her new Servant to the point that Ereshkigal looks like she might cry, Shirou spares a glance to the alternate version of Saber stood stoically at his side. They’ve barely exchanged a handful of words at this point, when compared to Rin and her summons. Should he try and say something to her? What even was there to say, all things considered?

“Ahem…”

Dr. Roman’s throat clearing is a gift from above, and one Shirou decides to immediately latch onto despite Rin clearly not hearing the Acting Director. Clearing his own throat, Shirou speaks up loudly… loud enough that Rin DOES hear him and finally stops tearing Ereshkigal a new asshole.

“Yes sir? What is it?”

Everyone turns towards the good doctor, who pauses for a moment to give Shirou a nod of thanks before clapping his hands together and plastering a somewhat fake smile on his face.

“R-Right! I was originally going to have you all get straight to work seeing how much still needs to be done to save humanity… but I see now that sending you all off on missions as you currently are would be a recipe for disaster. So let’s just… take half a day to get to know each other and make sure you can all work together properly first, yeah? We’ll reconvene here later this afternoon and see where we all stand.”

Oh. That was a good idea, but also… Shirou couldn’t help but feel a little anxious as he throws a glance towards the altered Saber. Hm, he hoped that they COULD get along. But how to try and break the ice, so to speak?

“Yes, I think that would be a very good idea. I need some time to… lay down the law here.”

Rin’s no-nonsense tone provokes another squawk from Ereshkigal, but for all that the Goddess of the Underworld is the Goddess of the Underworld, she doesn’t actually try to say anything in response to that. Man, despite them clearly having an acrimonious relationship, Rin pretty much already has Ereshkigal under control, doesn’t she? That’s his Rin, always working fast.

Regardless, with a plan of action reached, they all end up splitting up, and Shirou finds himself walking through the halls of Chaldea with Saber Alter following his every move. The yellow-eyed, pale-skinned version of one of his lovers is quiet, even as Shirou finds himself torn between two possible destinations. In the end though, he chooses the kitchen over his and the girls’ apartment suite. Maybe it’s cowardly, but he decides that Artoria and her alternate self don’t necessarily need to meet right this moment.

As they enter Chaldea’s cafeteria to find it currently devoid of people, Shirou heads straight for the kitchen, throwing on an apron and collecting ingredients from their respective places quite rapidly. As he does so, Saber Alter pauses and tilts her head to the side.

“… I am not hungry. The FATE System sustains me, so I do not need to eat.”

Looking over at her for just a moment, Shirou doesn’t even slow down in his movements, chuckling softly as he shakes his head in amusement.

“I don’t pretend to know your past, but did the alternate me that you knew truly never cook for you?”

When she doesn’t answer him, he glances over again… to find that she has chosen to sit down at the counter across from where he’s cooking, her hands folded primly in her lap and her mask removed from her eyes. She stares at his own hands as they work through the simple act of preparing food. It’s something Shirou has done thousands of times before and something he hopes to do thousands of times in the future.

Food is… easy, really. Even the most complex dishes are so very simple for him. And the simplest dishes… well, they can be just as good so long as they’re given the attention and care that they deserve. In this moment, Shirou goes ahead and prepares something simple. Fish on top of a bed of rice. Nothing truly spectacular, but he pours his heart and soul into it all the same, like he does with all his dishes.

Part of him wonders how Rin is doing with Ereshkigal at the moment. Or even what Ritsuka might be doing with Mash, despite the two of them having the most experience working together now. In his mind’s eye, he imagines Rin tugging on Ereshkigal’s ear, berating the Goddess of the Underworld for something while in turn the blonde doppelganger whines and begs for mercy. A chuckle leaves his lips unbidden at the thought, something that causes Saber Alter to shift in her seat.

Glancing over at her again, he smiles softly.

“You don’t have to wear that armor all the time; you know. We’re safe enough here that you can get more comfortable if you like.”

She stares at him unblinking for a long moment at that, long enough that Shirou almost takes that to be her answer… namely, no answer at all. But then she finally looks down at herself.

“… Very well.”

In an instant, her armor fades away. For a split second, Shirou sees everything and feels a little embarrassed, despite it literally being something he’s seen before. But then, just because one of his lovers was identical to his new Servant didn’t mean he needed to be ogling her naked form. Luckily, she doesn’t stay naked for long, as a beautiful dark blue shoulderless dress forms instead. Complete with arm-sleeves and a choker, it suits her quite well even if it seems a little too nice for Chaldea’s cafeteria.

Shirou tries not to stare too much at Saber Alter’s cleavage, even as she sits there silent as before, waiting patiently. Until finally… it’s done. The simple plate of fish on a bed of rice is set down in front of Saber Alter, and Shirou provides a fork and knife as well for her before giving her an encouraging smile.

“Go ahead, try it.”

For a moment, the yellow-eyed Servant hesitates… then, very slowly and carefully, she cuts a bite of fish and forks it up with some of the rice. Then, she places it in her mouth and closes her lips around the utensil. Shirou watches intently, wanting to capture the exact moment that the tastes hit her. That was why he cooked. To make people happy. It was why he did almost everything he did, really. He-

Shirou blinks. Where did it go? Looking between Saber Alter and the suddenly completely cleaned plate, he furrows his brow in confusion, even as she daintily dabs the corner of her mouth with a napkin. The meal he’d made her was… gone. In what felt like an instant. He’d let himself get distracted for a mere second and she’d positively devoured it.

… Heh, she really was just another version of Artoria at her core, wasn’t she? Sure, she’d clearly gone through different experiences than his lover, but at the same time…

“Should I make you another plate? And also… what would you prefer I call you? I should probably admit that I already know an Artoria who likes to go by Saber sometimes, so…”

Tilting her head to the side, the yellow-eyed King of Knights sniffs.

“… They call me Saber Alter here, do they not? Continuing to do so is fine. I will be Saber Alter.”

Shirou nods slowly, before gesturing back to his cooking station, wordlessly reinforcing the other question she asked. For a long moment, Saber Alter considers his offer… then, she stands up and walks around the counter. Shirou watches her, a little confused as she gets closer and closer to him. And then suddenly, she has him by the arms and is pushing him up against the wall. At first, he thinks she’s attacking him. Then… well, her lips are on his lips and he realizes what she’s actually doing.

As Saber Alter kisses him, the taste of fish and rice still on her tongue, Shirou can’t help but blush a little bit. Which is strange because he’s the guy and she’s the girl. Then again, she’s also a version of the King of Knights, so was it really THAT strange? All the same… he should probably put a stop to this before it gets too far…

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A/N: Discussion Question! Do you think everyone else is getting along right now as well as Shirou and Saber Alter are? :V