Handbook of Erotic Fantasy: Ring of Invisibility (Patreon)

I guess that word has got out about that dragon hoard. Yet another adventurer has fallen prey to the cunning Bushtagruüm’s cursed treasure, and it looks as if the on-again off-again Warlock/Ninja ship is sailing towards “off-again.” I don’t know about you guys, but this would motivate me to do some dragon-slaying ASAP. Gathering a party willing to tackle yet another sex dungeon might be easier said than done though. Those things tend to get you a reputation at your FLGS.

As our heroes ponder the implications of storming another very-horny dungeon, I can’t help but ponder the plight of invisible partymates. For every rogue stealthily creeping into backstab position, there’s a wizard out there itching to throw a fireball.

“Conjuring an incandescent orb between my fingers, I hurl it into the chamber, carefully positioning my magical mini-nuke so as not to hit Fast Fingers Mcgillicutty.”

“Um, dude? You can’t see Fast Fingers.”

“Oh. Well can he maybe make some noise so I know where he is?”

“No way! “The monsters will spot me if I do!”

“Make a Reflex save then.”

“You’re despicable.”

And scene. Ain’t nobody’s likes taking a faceful of friendly fire. But if putting your AoE in the wrong square is bad, sticking your rod of the python in the wrong hungry pit may be worse.

RING OF THE BLUNDERING VIRGIN

Source Mordenkainen's Tome of Hoes

Aura faint illusion; CL 3rd;

Slot dick; Weight —

DESCRIPTION

This simple silver ring is indistinguishable from a ring of invisibility. When activated for the first time it disappears from the user’s finger, reappearing in a sexually inconveninet spot on the vitcim’s body. The precise location varies by physiology.

Male victims of the curse find themselves wearing a delicate silver cock ring. Female victims receive a new gential piercing instead. Less common morphologies might find themselves possessed of a tongue, tail, or hectocotylus rings. In all cases, the result is the same. Checks made for acts of physical lovemaking receive a -10 competence penalty, as the affected body parts are rendered invisible and difficult to coordinate with sighted partners.

The wearer cannot remove the ring unless the magic of the curse is negated. This can be achieved by successfully bringing at least three different partners to climax (usually a DC 10 Dexterity check). If any of these checks result in failure, however, the cursed creature must begin the decursing process over.