How to Get Young Adults to Wear Diapers (Prologue) (Patreon)

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 How to Get Young Adults to Wear Diapers

PROLOGUE

Ellen Degeneres: So really now you’re officially the spokesperson of the nocturnal enuresis issue among teens. Basically, you’re the face of bed wetting!

 Joanne: I guess I am, I mean... I like to consider my face as more than that.

The crowd laughs.

Ellen Degeneres: Obviously!

Joanne:But really it’s great to be the voice of such an important issue that was previously undocumented with teenagers and young adults due to the stigma associated with it. I’m glad that, by standing up and not being ashamed of my problem, I can help others have a voice. That I can help companies such as Kimberly-Clark develop products that correspond to their needs.

Ellen : Speaking of which, we can now see you in a Youtube advertisement, wearing the brand new... I guess you can say training pants? What do you call them?

Joanne: They’re Pull-Ups Youth.

Ellen: That’s right! And that video had a lot of people talking, as you we’re previously identifying yourself as a bedwetter on social networks... but the ad campaign is about a new product, for daytime wear. Many people saw it as a brave admission to being fully incontinent at your young age, but you later said you aren’t... is that correct?

Joanne: I did start out my partnership with Kimberly-Clark with a vlog series on my nightly and morning routine that included dealing with my bedwetting with the Goodnites underwear. Those shed light on a surprisingly common issue, but with the new ad campaign I wanted to show that it’s normal to have accidents from time to time, not just at night. It happens to more young people than you might think! Accidents happen, it’s not incontinence, but you better be safe than sorry!

Ellen: That’s... really I wasn’t aware of that. I guess it’s some kind of taboo that people don’t talk about, but now you’re saying you want to help break the shame and get more people to wear the product, your friends included. Are you friends participating?

Joanne: Of course, many of my friends are now wearing them just in case too on occasion. Whether were on a roadtrip, at a music festival, watching a movie at the theater... or really anywhere without easy bathroom access. As a matter of fact I have one on right now.

Joanne gets up an lifts her shirt up to show the waistband of her Pull-Ups, peeking at the top of her pants.

Joanne: They’re regular underwear, only with a little bit of padding.

Ellen: It does look very practical when you think of it. I mean, I’d wear one!

The crowd laughs.

Ellen: No but it’s true though I can’t even imagine how many times this would’ve saved me from embarrassent! Why didn’t we have those when I was a teen? The other night I was watching The Walking Dead, I could’ve certainly used one of those!

Crowd laughs, cheers.

Ellen: But really I admire your guts to admit of having that sort of need, especially at your age, it’s so important to have role models like you. Thank you so much for being with us today.

Pause. Alright let me start it from here. You’re probably wondering what kind of weird joke that was. A 20 year old on the Ellen Degeneres show, showing off that she’s wearing Pull-Ups in front of a 500 people audience and probably a couple of million more in front of their screens. 

That’s called shameless promotion folks, and you’re watching that shit everyday. Kimberly-Clark pays me a shitload of money to speak on their behalf. They’re trying to convince the world that there’s no age limit to wear diapers anymore. 

That ‘’just in case’’ tag line is written explicitly to market their product to customers who don’t need it. ‘’Better be safe than sorry’’, right?

 The hard part is changing people’s mindset towards the product. 

Do you know anyone who’d willingly put on a pair of Pull-Ups just because they’re going to an amusement park, a movie theater or on a night out? Why would they? 

Pull-Ups are for toddlers who aren’t potty trained yet. They’re literally diapers, except you put them on like underwear. Not very attractive for teenagers and their constant need to be cool, to be grown ups.

That’s where I come in. They needed a face for their new line of products, someone young and influential to shatter the stigma around this issue... and more importantly explore an all new, untapped... or should I say... untaped market.