Chapter 549 - Distant Friends (Patreon)

The month the Eventide Eclipse returned from the Phoenix Peaks.

Iona started wheezing the moment we crossed the doorway to home, slapping her knee and letting her laughs echoing through our villa.

“The look on their faces when we told them to all put it back!” She pulled the shock-despaired face that had been identically mirrored on nearly a hundred orphans faces at the same time.

I started to involuntarily laugh.

“I felt so bad for them! Just, like - there’s a good reason for this, we promise!” I said. “What was up with that crying girl? I felt so bad for her!”

Iona stopped laughing, an awkward look crossing her face.

“I’m pretty sure she’d pinned her heart on us adopting her.” She confessed. “And realized near the end of the day that wasn’t happening.”

I winced as auburn-haired Titania silently showed up in the entryway, a tray of light snacks and drinks prepared. 

“Thank you.” Iona hovered them over to us, stepping out of her boots.

“Thanks!” I echoed, opening my mouth, tilting my head back, and letting Iona pour the water in it. It was dumb, it was silly, but it was fun.

“Do we know if Auri is planning on baking tonight, or should I prepare the evening’s meal?” Titania asked.

“Why don’t you prepare for five plus Fenrir?” I suggested. Fenrir got his own food classification, given how much he could pack away. “You’re invited to join us, as always, and Auri might bring Atlas or some other friend round.”

Currently, there were no Valkyries stopping by, and the pile of waiting letters was quite thin. It just drove home how few of them were around.

Titania bowed.

“I’m honored that you’d invite me, but I’d be far more comfortable eating alone. If you wish, I will dine with you.” She gracefully deflected my invitation, and I shrugged.

“No worries!”

Titania bowed

“I’m pretty sure I mentioned we weren’t looking to adopt.” I circled back round to the earlier conversation. 

“They’re children, we could’ve ran an entire parade past them telling them we weren’t looking to adopt and had them all recite it eight times before we started, and half of them would still be secretly harboring hope.” Iona said.

“Ah, fine, alright.” I conceded. “Dinner?”

Iona smirked savagely at me.

“I think we’ve got about thirty minutes before then. Need to let poor Titania cook, and I’ve got the perfect activity after today’s work.”

I grinned back.

“So do I! I’ve got that [Handy] skill I want to work on. Build a few new cabinets for my [Tower], maybe a nice dresser, you know.”

I winked at Iona, knowing I was being a little imp. She held her hand out and I took it, happily letting Iona drag me to a room we’d cleared out specifically for this task that got my wife more excited than anything else. 

A table dominated the middle of the room, and a number of smaller tables were pushed against the walls. Reams of blank paper were stacked on each one, three inkpots and a half-dozen quills neatly lined up on every desk. In large letters I’d made a sign that hung from the back.

Operation: Moonfall.

========================================

Titania was a treat, and had outdone herself once again. Plates of little dippers were scattered all over the table. Bread cubes and pear slices, broccoli and cauliflower, roasted potatoes and pickles were all over the place, a bubbling pot of cheese fondue in the middle. After saying a quick variant of grace, Iona and I were merrily digging in with Fenrir at the end, the meal for six turning into three.

Titania was preparing the second course, a hearty broth where we’d dunk in shrimps and beef cubes, more bread and ravioli, thin slices of goat and salmon, cook them on the spot, and eat them. A chocolate course was after, and it was only Iona’s rule that we give Titania a raise just four times a year that stopped me from paying her more than I made.

“Open!” I commanded, and Iona obliged. I [Teleported] in a beautiful piece of roasted broccoli, the cheese dripping off it into her mouth. 

Iona levitated a few into my mouth, and really, who needed hands at this point?

There was a knock on the door, and I almost choked as cheese tried to go down the wrong pipe. Iona pounded my back as I reached for some water. Titania started to head off, and I waved her down as my food failed to murder me.

“No no, I’ve got this.” I wiped my face off, stood up, and headed for the door. Iona joined me, and I focused on my senses, trying to figure out what was going on. Fenrir raised his head briefly, snorted, then went back to eating his entire raw cow.

It was a bit of a curse knowing absolutely everything sometimes, and I often narrowed things down when I wanted to enjoy life and not know about mold, or rats scurrying along the edges of the villa, looking for a way in. We got more visitors than we used to, the start of a village springing up along the base of the mountain, but it was rare for people to trek alllll the way up to our door, especially now that there were other people they could bother if they were like, stuck in a storm or something.

Wait, there was a unicorn at the door? Oh! And a familiar person!

I flung open the door with a smile.

“Amber! You rascal, how’d you know we had an extra place at dinner?” I greeted my former apprentice and old friend, who grinned and tapped her pouch. Her lucky coin was in there, and of course she’d show up right as we had two extra places set at the table.

“You know how!” She said.

It was like I’d blinked, and years had been added onto her. A few more lines, that intangible quality as people aged and became more comfortable with themselves and life. Gems studded her braid, and she had more secreted all over her person. Her eye and limp were the same, and I suppose any payment demanded by the fae was not so easily circumvented. [Identify] brought back that she was at level 410. I wanted to ask about that, but-

“Skye!” Iona shouted, reaching out to embrace the other woman. “And Varuna! How are you?”

Skye!? She was a yuki-onna, which explained the low temperature I sensed, and our old college suitemate! Last I heard she’d been trying to find employment with one of the minor elven households. What was she doing here?!

Skye embraced Iona back.

“Better.” She cooly said with the refined voice of nobility. I swear I could hear the tinkling of snowflakes hitting each other as they fell in her voice. The effect was so cool. Pun intended. 

“Come in, come in, all of you! I don’t think we’ve got anything fit for a unicorn right now, but dinner’s on the table and hot, and I insist you join us! Tell us everything that’s going on!”

Amber waltzed in like she owned the place, while Skye was a little more demure. Varuna tried to stick his head in, and Iona had a pained look on her face. Our front door was generous, but it wasn’t exactly horse-sized generous, and unicorns tended to be larger as a rule. Iona shot me a quick apologetic look, and I shrugged in response. I didn’t mind, it was what it was for.

“Varuna, we’ve got a lovely garden that you can munch on, but right now I don’t think our villa is large enough for you.” Iona apologized.

The unicorn looked like this was a classic disappointment, and with a magical whinny and toss of his glorious mane, trotted off to the garden, his silver hooves on dirt sounding like wind chimes. 

Iona didn’t wait until we’d made it to the table to start asking Amber questions. Given what she was asking, I immediately understood the why.

“You’ve classed up your [Healer] class, and that could’ve only happened if it was ‘lucky’. I don’t see the mortal realms letting you in anytime soon, so it seems like the coin’s suddenly cut off more than half the world for you. Have you gotten any indication that the next big Immortal war’s going to start?”

Normally, I’d think those sort of questions could wait, but Amber’s coin suggested that she might arrive at our doorstep the literal minute everything went to hell. It would be ‘lucky’ for her to be under our aegis at the time. 

Amber sucked in her breath through her teeth, continuing to limp through our villa. 

“I don’t think so, but I took the suggestion the same way you did. Flipped three times even, and ever since then I’ve been stocking up hard on defensive gems.”

Part of our conversation from our earlier Operation: Moonfall jumped into my head. Damnit, Amber’s coin was really lucky. Waltzed right into our life just as we realized we wanted to buy a few dozen gems.

“By the way, I think we need to place a large gem order.” I mentioned as we entered the dining room.

“Business after food?” Iona suggested with a pointed glare my way.

“Sounds good to me!” Amber said.

We all settled in, the table suddenly full, and Iona heaped Amber and Skye’s plates full of dippers. The only thing breaking the silence for a few minutes was the sound of hungry travelers devouring food. And hungry Valkyries. And greedy Sentinels.

Nom nom nom. 

I could see some color returning to Skye’s cheeks, and Iona had excellent timing.

“So! I’m dead curious, why’d you two end up over here?”

Skye took on a business-like tone.

“As you know, I’d been effectively exiled from my country when I bonded with Varuna and seized Immortality. We went to the School to try and obtain an education and a career, but ever since leaving the School it hasn’t gone so well. First…”

In the hands of even a [Mediocre Bard], Skye’s tale would be a gripping epic. Getting a job was hard. With no true connections, being a different race, and no long experience to draw on, she struggled to find gainful employment. 

Pride wasn’t an issue. She was willing to work at any level, from a [Cleaning Maid] - a far step down from the [Princess] she’d been before bonding - all the way to a [Negotiator], one of the roles she’d trained for.

Between bandits, slavers, near-starvation, Vorler, and overeager [Farriers], her luck had been bad in some respects, and read like the epic of a [Heroic Adventurer] in others, Varuna carrying the day time and time again. I didn’t hold the [Adventurer] thing against her in the slightest. First, she wasn’t actually registered as one, nor did she act like one, and second, we all did what we had to do to survive.

I’d been lucky in being able to find a ‘job’ as a Ranger. Sure, I’d been thrown into a slave pen at one point, and listening between the lines, Skye had a few close calls herself. I had a great amount of sympathy - but for the grace of the gods go I. Heck, if I didn’t have all the stories from Earth, if I hadn’t been so entertaining, Julius would’ve said no, and I would’ve… I honestly didn’t know what my fate would’ve been like. With the retrospect of age and experience - it wouldn’t have been good. At all. 

“... it seems like with the ever-shifting environment of Exterreri I might have better luck finding employment. A number of the ‘Immortal movement’ laws had previously given me concern. Forgive me for saying this, but I was hoping to find a job and stay there, not be forced to move every few decades, but circumstances have forced me to reevaluate. Around the same time, I met a remarkably charming young woman, who insisted it’d be ‘lucky’ for her if I came along to Exterreri. I was skeptical, of course, but Amber started to list off people she knew in Exterreri. Imagine my surprise when I heard your names! I imagine a skill was at play, came along, and here I am.”

We narrowed our eyes at Amber, who grinned like the reprobate she was. One thing she was sure about over the years - Amber’s coin was lucky purely for her. She was the one benefiting, and just because it was good for her, it didn’t mean it was good for the other people caught up in her wake. As money-focused and mercantile as Amber was, she didn’t want to hurt people, but there was no promise that the arrangements she was making and people she introduced to each other were good for each other. 

Gigantic book of social interactions or not, I was still a little on the thick side when it came to implications and unasked questions, nevermind the terrifying headache that was second-order effects. However thick as a stone wall my head might be, I did catch the hint of a question in Skye’s story. Iona clearly had as well, and I’d take her lead on when a good time to properly discuss it would be.

“I suppose it’s our turn to explain what we’ve been up to since we graduated!” I said. “First were our adventures at the School, and it’s such a shame you graduated when you did! Iona beat the stuffing out of the entire Rolland team single-handedly in a one against seven, with the Moon Goddesses personally descending to show their support!”

Skye threw Iona a thoroughly unimpressed look, then quickly regained control of herself.

“No no, I’ve got to hear this.” Iona said. “What’s up?”

Skye took a centering breath and straightened herself up in her chair, the perfect image of refined elegance. I could see the [Princess] she’d been. 

“I’m aware of exactly when that was, and I hope that my words do not cause you to change your disposition towards me.” Her tone was smooth as glass. “I was, unfortunately, engaged in negotiations for a position at the time. We were walking down a forest path together, and the tone of the conversation was… cordial. Polite. We seemed to be reaching an accord. Then the moons shifted, the earth moved, and the entire estate was thrown into a panic, concerned about an assault. We attempted to continue the conversation after, but the mood was broken. The conversation perfunctory. I can’t say I am sure I would’ve been able to secure the position, however…”

Whoops. Iona looked embarrassed, and briefly closed her eyes. There was a sudden presence in the room, weight of the divine weighing down on us, then a plop as an object dropped into our fondue. I immediately [Teleported] it out, examined it a moment, decided it was for Varuna and not Fenrir, then teleported it to Skye, who jumped in surprise. I turned to Iona.

“Did we just get a divine hoof rasp?” I asked in disbelief. Skye was eyeing the rasp with disbelief, like it was a snake going to bite her.

“Yes?” Iona had a direct line to the Goddesses, and it sounded like she couldn’t believe it herself. Amber’s eyes shone with greed.

“Should I change out the pot?” Titania asked, the normally unflappable [Housekeeper] seemingly unsure.

“As weird as it is, I think it’s even more sterile than our forks. It’s brand new and unused, right?” I asked Iona. She was suspiciously silent, and I knew that look on her face.

“Did we just get a used unicorn rasp into our dinner?” Amber asked.

Titania didn’t wait for an answer to our question. She swooped in and stole the pot away.

==================================

“What do you think?” Iona asked a few hours later. I flicked her with a finger, purging both of us of the generous amounts of alcohol we’d been drinking.

“Titania, do you need a topup or energizer?” I asked her. She shook her head.

“Begging your pardon mistress, I’m unsure why I’m involved in this conversation at all.”

Iona waved her complaint down.

“Because you’ve got seniority. You’ve been around longer. You’d be working with her. If you think you can do the job and are better suited to it, let us know. If there are areas where you’d overlap, let us know. We trust you and your judgment, and you’ve proven to be extremely capable over the years. I don’t want to step on your toes in the slightest, and value an honest assessment.”

Titania hesitated, then answered.

“There’s only minimal overlap between what Skye proposed she can do, and what I do. The overlap primarily pertains to the groceries, and I’d be more than happy to offload that chore onto someone else. I like being here, and if her great big unicorn can make the trip to Sanguino regularly, good for them!”

Iona and I traded a quick look, and I felt guilty. We were pretty close to the city for us, but for people without the same levels and skills it was quite a hike. The little village growing by the base of the mountain did promise to eventually alleviate that, but for now, I was tempted to say yes purely based on that. Iona fractionally tilted her head, wanting me to speak my mind.

“I’m a bit of a sucker.” I freely admitted. “But Skye’s arguments and skillset were compelling. Titania keeps this place perfectly, and you’re charismatic, charming, and like people. But what she pointed out about the village developing, the ‘Immortals on a mountain’, and the sheer amount of administrative and accounting work that she can keep on top of and opportunities she can seize sounds good. Even Night has someone who can handle that sort of work for him, arguably two people, and didn’t the Valkyries have someone similar? We’ve got the funds, we know Skye, and hey, as she mentioned, unicorn manure does great things for a garden!”

Iona chuckled.

“Your true motives are revealed! You just want more mangos!”

I gasped and put a hand over my heart.

“Well I never! Of course I just want more mangos! But it’d be cheaper for me to just buy more, honestly, than go through something this convoluted. From a humanistic standpoint, I like being able to help people. From a Sentinel point of view, our team’s tiny and most Sentinels have someone to handle administration and paperwork. Financially, we’re in great shape. Hiring people to make our life easier seems like a good investment. It seems good to me.”

Iona hummed non-committedly. 

“That’s a good argument for getting a [Majordomo] or [Chief of Staff], but is Skye the best one possible?”

That, I didn’t have a great answer to. My instincts wanted to say YES!, but there was an impulsive tribal instinct involved. We knew Skye, it was easy to bring her onboard and call it a day. It didn’t mean she was the best candidate. The ‘Varuna go vrooom’ argument was one I could get behind.

“She… might not be.” I admitted, recognizing her admitted lack of experience doing the actual job itself. “What do you propose?”

“Why don’t we let her crash for a month or two as a guest, as is only proper.” Iona said. “We’d do that either way. Then, I’ll poke around a bit. See if there’s anyone else we could compare to, and-”

I had great senses, and while I didn’t want to know everything always going on around me, certain sounds cut through the shroud of disinterest I tried to throw up, that perked my ears up like nothing else and hyper-focused me to using all my senses to the best of their ability.

The quiet rattle of chainmail was one of those.