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I've cropped this from the main image, just to make it easier to see.

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Anonymous

No hull number?

Anonymous

Very nice. Thanks

Magnus Wittstrom

I like all the details you can see now, very cool.

bigdawguw65

Awesome !! Reminds me a little of a Flat-top especially in front , can't wait to see it in it's gleaming white armor .

Muledrvr

Nice.... Makes me think aircraft carrier in space, but with guns on the flight deck lol. I can see that it would be a natural progression from Earth ships.

Anonymous

Looks more like an earth naval ship than a space ship especially the front. Front needs a redesign

Anonymous

Nothing wrong with looking like a planetary ship, Google Minmatar Rupture sometime. A couple others are Caldari Corax or Gallente Algos. Although the two latter look more like subs (picture the Algos without the outriggers).

Anonymous

Just a couple things. I think the artist did an excellent job. But I have some concerns. From the beginning you mentioned the Invictus had armor plates that retracted to reveal the primary weapon systems, like the beam lasers amidships, along the dorsal and ventral areas of the ship. Don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to criticize. Just making a suggestion. I also feel with the invictus being an assault cruiser it should have a slightly more aggressive profile. More like the predator it is in space. Think shark meets barracuda meets bad ass space warship 😁 This is just the image your story brings to mind, Tefler.

Jedi Khan

So those big ass turrets in the middle of the top deck are the beam lasers that are supposed to be embedded in the nose of the ship? The same ones that'll be replaced by the Nova Lances? Don't get me wrong, I like the ship, it's very nice. It's just that the beam lasers are not at all how I pictured them, and the positioning would be a bit awkward later when the Nova Lances get installed. Isn't it described that when the Nova Lances charge up, a big ball of energy forms at the bow? That'd be kinda hard to do from amidships like it's pictured here. I had pictured the Beam Lasers to be more like the torpedo tubes of a sub, set into the nose with doors that retract to open the barrels for firing.

ringill

It does look very good in close-up, the artist did a very nice job certainly way better than I could ever manage. But ... To me it look far too much like the demon spawn of a battleship and an aircraft carrier and some of the detail just doesn't fit. For instance the hanger is too far back, it should be within 200m of the bow, which makes the cargo bay too small which affects the airlock position which makes the command deck too far back. Still, it's really easy being a critic :-) And while I'm on a roll, who thought it was a good idea to put the command deck and fire control as huge sticky up bits like that, you may as well paint them orange and hang a sign on them saying "Fire here for maximum effect with miminal effort". You can see why John wanted the combat bridge built!

Anonymous

Completely agree. Though this is an artists rendering, and he's not an addict like the rest of us to pick up on these details (hey, artist guy, I've got a story to recommend to you...).

Forbsey

I've always imagined (unmodified) the Invictus to be more angular at the bow and taper off at the back in a diamond bow facing with the beam lasers in a indented segment at the bow with a 40 degree arc to allow for the ship scything they have done with their enemies. The top deck having a small awning to accentuate the angular shark like nature of the spaceship. I also thought of the mass drivers front to back rather than beside each other like a traditional battleship but that may be just me. The armor plating clearly lined throughout the ship in differing sized squares for different sections obfuscating the location of the weapon hard points. The cargo bay making most of the space at the middle-aft and most of the fore of the ship while the landing bay housed above the middle-aft section. The engine part is what I thought of, no problems there but the command section on the top deck was like the pics square glassed section in front of the tower? (which I don't recall) being bigger covering the tower and more a semi circle like the interior design of the command deck inside. The gap in the middle doesn't fit with my imagination of the Invictus, but the diamond shape I mentioned. I don't think the artist has added enough weapons to the ship (remembering a scene: bristling with weapons) The spacing of the said weapons are spaced strategically (Gatling lasers, etc). The number of weapons had been numbered at some point during battles. Can't remember the exact number though. The diamond shape of the overall ship at a small point at the end, maybe half as small as the current pic. Hope this helped!

Anonymous

Something I learned a long time ago, when trying to transfer ideas from an imaginary image medium, I.e. Books or radio, someone is going to invariably disagree about how it should look. If you dislike how it looks, feel free to continue seeing it your own minds eye as you like. In this case, I'll let the creator of the idea of the ship be my guide.

Forbsey

I agree, just putting some perspective out there :)

Tefler

"it should be within 200m of the bow" The Hangar where they keep the Raptor ends just at the point where Dana hacked the ship in half. It might not look like it from the angling of the ship above, but it is just about right. It'll be easier to see in a profile shot, which I'll ask him to do for the next one. :-)

Anonymous

@Tef, you told me earlier that the Invictus render will go further modifications, so i hope this isn't it. The artist's work is amazing but its not how i pictured it in my mind and also there're some discrepancies from the story: (1) The beam lasers were supposed to be embedded in the bow, with only a portion of it visible on the outside (as revealed during the refit at Genthalas to install the nova lances, remember the line were they talk about removing the armor to access the beam laser barrel? and also when they speak about the nova lances making the nimbus at the prow while charging?) (2) The weapons are supposed to be concealed under armor plating (3) The name 'Invictus' painted on the flank is not proportional to the size of the ship. 20ft high writing translates to around 6m. Also, the name is usually written towards the stern,while the pennant number is more prominently displayed on the flank (but you have never mentioned one so I guess it's not necessary here). (4) The position of the bridge and fire control tower is still not right as per the story. Also, the position of the airlock and the size of the hangar/cargo bay.

Tefler

The artist had already spent a lot of time on the picture and I would have had to pay him extra for more changes. 1) + 2) are just to make the beam lasers look more impressive, just seeing gun barrels embedded in the hull wouldn't have looked as good. (Like the Mass Drivers - you guys know they're there, but to anyone new they just look like dots on the bow!) 3) If I'd halved the size of the name, it would have made it hard to read in the picture. 4) The Bridge is positioned correctly, but the angle of the ship makes it hard to tell. If you look at the modern cruiser on the left of the main painting, you can see just how long the engines are, but they look deceptively short on the Invictus. This picture also served two useful functions. The first was to replace the banner art on the Patreon page, the second to provide an interesting book cover for the first ebook. If I was purely going for a showcase of the Invictus, I would have made it twice as big, twisted it so it was almost in profile, then showed it exchanging broadsides with the Stalingrad in the background. Unfortunately the artist charges $700 for a big picture like this, and I wouldn't have been able to use much of something like that for bannerart or the eBook cover.

Anonymous

1+2) The picture could have shown the gun emplacements in a depressed position w.r.t the hull profile and armored sections right next to them seeming like it just opened up to reveal the guns. The beam lasers seem the most out of place though. The story clearly mentions them located deep in the prow of the ship. I know they wouldn't be easily identifiable but it would have looked amazing when they're being fired! Especially the nova lances. 3) I realize they'd be harder to read. But try reducing it some more, trust me it'd look better. And the proper position of the name of a vessel is at the stern, especially military ones. 4) As for the position of the bridge, i guess you're right. But i was expecting the hangar to be located more forward, towards the middle, and larger (to accommodate the Raptor which is around 50m, the hangar should be a bit more longer making it more than 1/10th of the Invitus' length) 5) one more extra point. I can see that the artist is showing the atmospheric shielding in place at the cargo bay and hangar. But the armored doors are missing, since they open outwards. Its better to show a glowing outline of the closed doors if you want to make them more noticeable. I know redoing the artwork will cost you extra money. Its great to finally see the Invictus as you see it while writing the story, and i really love the work. But as I've said before, I'm a sucker for technical accuracy :P Maybe if you decide to do a more detailed work someday, you can improve upon it! Just my 2 cents :)

Tefler

I'll definitely get him to change the Nova Lance position for the white extended version. 3) As I say, I'd have to pay for more changes and if you make it much smaller, you won't be able to read it on the banner art or the ebook cover. I don't think I've ever said the name was on the stern, only that it was on the hull. "the proper position of the name of a vessel is at the stern" Not in sci-fi: <a href="http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/masseffect/images/e/e1/Normandy_Render.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/2000?cb=20120703201556" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">http://vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/masseffect/images/e/e1/Normandy_Render.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/2000?cb=20120703201556</a> <a href="https://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/babylon5/images/0/08/Agamemnon.png/revision/latest?cb=20110801191331" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/babylon5/images/0/08/Agamemnon.png/revision/latest?cb=20110801191331</a> <a href="https://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/galaxyquest/images/7/70/Protector-2.png/revision/latest?cb=20121219225902" rel="nofollow noopener" target="_blank">https://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/galaxyquest/images/7/70/Protector-2.png/revision/latest?cb=20121219225902</a> 4) The Hangar is in the middle, but as I say, it's hard to tell from the angle of the ship. I literally got a ruler to measure it when he sent me the render. The forward edge was just over 200m from the prow and the doors were about 60m wide. The Raptor is 40m long. 5) The armoured bay doors raise up into the ceiling rather than outwards. They are actually closed (he originally backlit them with orange lighting), but they are outlined in white lights. If you zoom in really close to the base of the hull, you can make them out. The only thing that's really inaccurate are the Beam Lasers, but as I say, I let that go just they look better that way. :-)

Anonymous

The Nova Lances would look so awesome! 3) Yea, I know it'll be hard to see the name if it's smaller. And I know different Sci-Fi ships have them all over the place. But I was speaking about current military protocols. You're free to have them anywhere you want :D 4) If you've taken the dimensions of the hangar into consideration then it's fine. I thought it looked a bit off. Must be the perspective. 5) I do remember reading about the armoured bay doors raising upwards into the ceiling as they open. But i always though that the door splits into half, as one opens inwards, the other opens outwards, acting as a ramp when the Invictus lands on some surface. Practically speaking, it'd be impossible to swing the whole door inside, due to its sheer weight. Also, the swinging action will make a huge space inside the cargobay/hangar unusable. But these are just somethings that I've noticed. Cheers!

Anonymous

Nick Jo, Nova Lances are not on the current art work. As the Invictus hasn't received that technology, as of the first e-book.

Anonymous

I know, but the nova lances use the beam laser hardpoints, which is supposed to be in the prow.

Anonymous

But Tefler said he'll correct it in the next artwork.

Anonymous

Perhaps Tefler meant by this that the Armored Bay Doors "roll" upwards into the ceiling, like a modern day garage door.