braindrain (Patreon)

I can’t stop crying and my plants are dying 
That makes it sound like I’m unhappy but I’m not 
I’m everything everywhere all at once 
But I haven’t seen the movie so maybe I’m just lost 
I once thought I knew which direction to go 
But a cat in a tree got inside my mind and laughed at my certainty 
Can’t shake this feeling that nothing is meant for me 
But see that’s not even true 
I can’t even write a poem without contradicting myself
Because the truth is 
I have a hard time taking me seriously 
Change my mind 12 times before breakfast
And even then 
I find it all quite odd 
Am I seeking and finding 
Or am I just slowly dying 
I think perhaps both 
And perhaps I am a special girl in this beautifully tragic world 
Or maybe I am a tragically beautiful concept that can’t quite be fully realized
Or maybe I am just another person that can’t get out of their own way 
I haven’t been sleeping well 
But you might not be able to tell 
I would try to explain but I don’t think it’s sane 
And I’m just too tired
Forgive me