Faith, Draft 1, 1 5, outline, CH 16 (Patreon)

Faith in the Family, Commentary, CH 16

Thanksgiving Dinner happens, and in no time, the conversation is embarrassing Thomas.

One up side of having Ben going over my version of the story is that he can tone down where I’m innapropriate. I have no ‘filters’ when it comes to how I write. I’ll let the characters talk about sex while a toddler is in their arms because in the context it makes sense. There will even be utterly implications made there, again, because to these people, it’s normal (read Inheriting the Line to find out why it’s normal, if you haven’t) without regards to how the reader might react to it.

My editor had issues with some situations in Inheriting the Line similar to this, but they happened in the later books and while I really don’t care what a reader will think of me for them, I was able to keep them in by pointing out that anyone who read that book had survived all the things I’d put in the previous ones. so this wouldn’t bother them.

But yeah, those were the main changes Ben did.

So that’s it on the comments, I hope you enjoy the file