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Fuck fuckity fuck fuck FUCK! (Patreon)

Published:
2019-05-04 14:38:34
Imported:
2021-07

Content

After two weeks in the ICU the father-in-law was going to be released to a nursing care home to recover from a long list of things happening to him now. Finally strong enough to move again. Then, sometime last night he took another turn. He is back in ICU after complications arose...again...
Now, this next bit is going to paint me as an insensitive asshat. And perhaps I am, but this is more for me venting than anything I really mean.
I am tired of doing a four hour round trip everyday to sit, thumb up my ass useless, sitting and doing fuck all while he just lays in bed. I can do nothing. My being there does nothing. The only reason I go is to be support for my wife and that's it right now. I just want to get home, mow my lawn, do the dishes, wash some clothes, plant some garden needs, Draw again more regularly. Fuck! I'm tired of the emotional ups and downs of all this. I just want my wife home, happy, no longer fretting over each turn of poor health he goes through. If he was a better man and took care of himself instead of being a selfish fuck he'd be better.

 Alright. I am sorry for the rant and fuckish attitude I have right now. I had today planned to draw, do a stream of arting and get some household needs caught up and was instead woken to news he has gone worse overnight again. Now, off to drive through traffic for two hours, sit and do nothing for twelve then drive two hours back again to do it all over again tomorrow.

 

Comments

George Blair

Sorry to hear. I will say from my experience on hospital stays, it does help if people come to spend some time with you. I'm sure you're doing more for your wife than she could ever explain. I think you have to talk to her and tell her you need a break from this or a recharge or whatever. Also if the house falls too far into disarray, it'll just cause more issues. Don't forget, if you don't take of you, you can't take care of her. Not that you need always come first, but don't abandon your needs.

Adam

I don't think you're insensitive. everyone deals with situations this way in their own way, and feeling powerless to do anything is pretty common when it involves a Family member's medical treatments.

Anonymous

You are talking about your feelings and frustrations. Self care is so important and so many people lose sight of that. You are not being insensitive, you are having a healthy amount of introspection. and as someone who has lost almost all of my Mothers side of the family, if he smoke or drank I would have no sympathy either. We appreciate the arts. But we are here for you. Let it out if it helps.

immortaltom
>>22398237

Thanks. We do try to get some time to spend on ourselves but it has always been in the morning before starting out trip north for visiting. By the time we get home though it's food, dogs fed, brush teeth then bed. I will be staying home for sure next Wen. though. We have an expensive delivery expected we ordered the day before all this happened.

immortaltom
>>22404099

I know. I just feel bad because there is fuck all for me to do to improve the situation outside of being moral support. Something I know full well is very powerful in itself. I just needed a rant and it helped. As well as seeing notes you have left here. They make both myself and my wife feel better knowing strangers are willing to reach out to us right now.

immortaltom
>>22417181

Thanks. Yes. Venting a little with this helped a lot today. :D I am sorry to hear you have gone through something similar. Your support with this comment did wonders for me. Thank you.