Abyssal Road Trip - 375 - Purpose (Patreon)

Amdirlain's PoV - Outlands - Custodian's safehold

Custodian's pronouncement about champions caused Livia to frown.

"What do you mean by that?" asked Livia.

"Aspects are the personification of the concepts, but we're not allowed to work directly against each other," replied Custodian, and they slowly started turning, sending rays of light from opposite sides of their spherical form. "If we could do that, lesser beings would simply get obliterated when caught in the crossfire between us. However, one fundamental rule of the realm is the need to balance the forces so that souls can have places to strive to better themselves. Of course, you get arguments about what is involved in bettering oneself and, just as some might see me as a positive aspect of protection, there are negative ones."

Livia lifted an eyebrow. "Do you see people bettering themselves as being able to protect what they care about better, and the aspects of destruction thinks it those with the power to annihilate more?"

"Indeed, societies aren't the only thing limited by their perceptions of what is right or wrong," agreed Custodian. "Your faith needs a strong creed or tenets to cut through some of that noise and provide focus."

"Because otherwise, they'd jump around more than Amdirlain's plans?" asked Livia.

"Hey now," protested Amdirlain.

A run of chimes that giggled through octaves erupted from Custodian. "To be fair, your Móðir is a locus that joins every concept. While most aspects would court her aid to further their ends, the realm's concepts want their mother's attention."

Livia frowned and tilted her head. "But aren't you a Concept?"

"I'm an Aspect of a Concept, not the Concept itself. Think of aspects as conduits—with personalities and reasoning—to the primal forces with whom you can't reason," clarified Custodian.

"I had wondered about Isa saying she worships the concept itself, and the same with Sarah," muttered Livia. "They've got ties to forces with whom there is no reasoning."

Custodian brightened, and a rainbow washed across the nearby columns. "Gideon didn’t give them the option to pick an Aspect to serve. First, because none of us are allowed to have Anar or Lómë as worshipers, and second, we wouldn't dream of having a bond that might challenge Amdirlain and Sarah's tie."

Amdirlain was tempted to curse up a storm but held her tongue.

"Can you explain why Amdirlain is a locus?" asked Livia.

"I was informed Amdirlain told you about her original lifetime. Gideon announced it a little while ago, and I won several large favours by having picked you would be told next," said Custodian.

"Livia didn't want to ask me any questions," explained Amdirlain, and she smiled reassuringly at Livia. "It's okay to talk to Custodian about it. They have knowledge that isn't fragmented like mine."

Livia exhaled slowly. "I still don't want to dig into Orhêthurin's past, but I'm concerned about the implications of you being a locus for all the concepts."

"To assess things correctly, one needs as much information as possible," said Amdirlain. "It's that judge training of yours showing up."

It’s also hard to protect someone when left in the dark, but I’m fine not sharing this with Silpar.

"That is likely," admitted Livia. "That aspects bet among themselves aside. From the Lómë tales of the Titan’s Songbird, I know that Orhêthurin helped the Titan create the realm. What you’re talking about seems far more than just a helper."

"Amdirlain needs to work on improving her explanations," said Custodian. "Orhêthurin was the architect of the planar framework and the realm's rules, not the Titan's helper. "

"What?" gasped Livia. "There is far more hidden behind what Móðir called a nickname that I had imagined."

"Should I not continue?" asked Custodian.

"It's fine. Go right ahead," reassured Amdirlain, and she reached out to give Custodian a comforting pat.

The Aspect trembled excitedly under her touch, and their account sped up. "While her father channelled the raw energy, Orhêthurin's music gave it form. Though perhaps, given how the designing was done, the principal composer might be the better term. Her music awakened all the aspects of the greater concepts, and from them came the shards that brought awareness to lesser aspects or mingled to form the junction points between several. Nicholaus was and is our father in how he cares for us, but Orhêthurin was our Goddess in all sense of the word. She was our creator, and her music was the lens by which our awareness bloomed and formed our personalities."

Note to self: go easy on giving Custodian head pats. I’m not even sure why I did that.

"Channeled energy?" asked Livia.

"From primordial sources and translated through the barrier he set between Far Chaos and the realm. He calls himself a crafter, not a visionary, and he only claims credit as his daughter wished to remain concealed. He isn't the most social, but we can see how deep his emotions run from our efforts to make Orhêthurin's designs come to life," answered Custodian.

“She designed all the stars?”

“She listened to the night sky in other realms and took in the songs of galaxies,” said Custodian. "Amdirlain now has a copy of Orhêthurin's original plans. There are so many galaxies in her plan that we've not yet completed a fraction of it, and some have designed extensions since its inception."

The crystals around the orrey's table aren't a record of what they had created but rather what she intended to have created.

Before Amdirlain could ask a question, Custodian continued. "Amdirlain's return added billions of new life forms onto the design boards, alien races from sci-fi shows she loved, but even more from lives I'm told she hasn't remembered."

Amdirlain's thoughts ranged from the black-and-white classics to the various modern aliens. "What lifeforms did he include?"

"I've said enough, but each represents treasured memories that hopefully provoke nostalgia if you ever come across them," buzzed Custodian merrily. "And you both have things to do, so chop chop, get to work, or should I tell you to suck it up, buttercup?"

Hopefully, they're not the run-screaming types of memories.

"Speaking of things from my past life, has Nicholaus said anything about my request to be allowed to dissemble the memories attached to my stalker's Soul?" asked Amdirlain.

"Amdirlain, Nicholaus' declaration doesn't allow for his removal from the Abyss until you are free," replied Custodian. "However, his Soul is no longer in Moloch's possession."

"How do I get truly free of the Abyss? What does that mean exactly? Right now, one of my worries is that I'll die once I'm free of being a Fallen," said Amdirlain.

Custodian chimed sourly. "No. If you got rid of it today, your Soul's essence is already too strong to perish, you a nascent Primordial. Once you’re free of the Fallen status though, you'll need to protect yourself. Its removal will also eradicate the shield of the Hidden about you."

"And that means I'll need to be as strong as possible," finished Amdirlain.

"Precisely. However, if you get too strong before selecting your transformation, getting any Tier 7 achievement in your next form will take a truly stellar accomplishment," offered Custodian.

Are they making a joke, or is that a reference to Gideon's request to establish a workable ecosystem on a planet?

"How can you tell Amdirlain that information, but Gideon trolls her?" asked Livia.

"The two reasons have to do with Gideon being the personification of Knowledge. They troll Amdirlain because they know how she reacts to that treatment. Also, their purpose is to know but, to balance their ability to be all-knowing, they have limits to what can be shared to those outside the Titan's forge room," explained Custodian. "If they freely gave Amdirlain guidance, they would have to balance that by sharing information with any of her enemies who possessed the right analytical capacity to ask. However, I can share what I need to protect treasured peoples, places, and objects."

"You do get rather heated and push even harder whenever Gideon baits you, Móðir," agreed Livia.

Moloch had Analysis within that vision.

His name died on Amdirlain's lips, an impenetrable white noise that blocked her intent to name him.

"You can't speak the names of deities in here that I don't allow," declared Custodian sternly.

Amdirlain frowned in confusion. "Deities? I was told he's a Demon Lord."

"He was, but you shouldn't have continued to hurt a being as strong as him when you couldn't finish the job," advised Custodian sourly. "I can stop any Deity from seeing in here, but some possess natures I find offensive. Even your intention to voice his name made him aware of the concept he supports and his nature. Hence, I can protect myself from further offence by blocking his name's utterance."

"I only destroyed a few of his demon lords," protested Amdirlain.

"And left him branded with feathers formed from Yang Mana that you sent down the Oath Link," corrected Custodian. "Out of fear, he took drastic action to protect the only individual he truly cares about: himself."

"Feathers of Yang Mana?" repeated Amdirlain incrediously. "Honestly, I wasn't sure that had even done anything but speed up each Demon Lord's destruction and maybe be an annoyance."

Custodian chimed. "You created an extreme quantity of excrement up to your chin yet again, Amdirlain. One of Hell's Dark Powers sponsored him into the divine ranks, and he is currently a Demi-god in their service. He seeks information on the Titan's Songbird. Yet neither he nor his mistress knows who you are, and while you remain one of the Hidden, it will stay that way even if you were in her presence."

"Do the aspects of protection know why he sought Hell’s shelter?"

"Nicely phrased. Yes, we do. It was to protect his life after he ran out of options, though it cost him trillions of souls from his treasury," advised Custodian. "They directed him to a Dark Power who would make his existence miserable and ensure they got what they wanted."

"Trillions of souls?" groaned Amdirlain, and she felt a knot of tension form within her.

"They'd sealed their fates through their choices. The rules don't require souls of mortals who willingly sold them for power in life to be released to Judgement or the afterlife of their deities," advised Custodian. "They are considered nothing more than trade goods within the Abyss's expanse. A Demon would have consumed them as an expensive treat, or something like a Balor would have used them to form a Demon. Instead, a Pit Fiend will probably craft them into a Devil unless the Dark Power Moloch sold them to tip the lot into The River Dis or one of its lakes to see what emerges. Should I let Laodice know you will speak with her?"

"I do wish to thank her for dismantling the sisterhood's strongholds so thoroughly," said Amdirlain. "I'll work on the repairs to the prisons until she arrives."

Custodian gave a bass thrumming sound. "I'd keep that in mind until you hear the topics she wants to address."

I guess I shouldn't be surprised Custodian isn't impressed. Laodice is the principal Aspect of War.

"Regardless, until she arrives, repairs would be good. I'd hate to have to draw down the stockpiles of shackles to reseal so many," continued Custodian.

The timers on the columns showed the weakest prison among the millions of prisons was still decades away from rupturing. Still, not knowing when she'd return, Amdirlain scanned all the column’s timers before she started on the most endangered prisons.

As Amdirlain started to stretch thousands of songs through the links that spanned planes, Custodian chimed in upset tones. "Stop that! You don't need to fix them all at once, and I can feel the damage you're doing to yourself."

"Custodian, while I appreciate your concern, I need to push my powers to strengthen them. Unfortunately, even repairing the prisons across the planes is too easy," chided Amdirlain.

"I'd ask that you handle them at a more sensible pace," requested Custodian, their tones warm with concern.

Silently, Amdirlain counted to a thousand and, realising how rapidly she managed it, went onto a hundred thousand before she calmly replied. "I can appreciate your essential need to be protective, but millions of prisons must be repaired. How can I put protecting myself above protecting the realm?"

Custodian gave another low off-tone in protest. "Amdirlain."

"That's my name," replied Amdirlain cheerfully.

"Have it your way," grumbled Custodian. "Can you at least do me one favour?"

"What is that?"

Custodian chimed softly. "Do something about that mapping cube in your Soulspace before it wakes up. It would be best if both you and they were clear of the infernal energies used in its creation. I thought you'd have paid more attention after all the gunk came out during your sigil reinforcement.”

“I thought that was from my time in the Abyss,” groaned Amdirlain.

“That mess wasn't just from time spent drawing Mana from the leylines of the abyss," noted Custodian.

Pulling the dimensional bags from inventory, Amdirlain extracted everything but the cube and stored it inside one of the bags before she hung it from her belt. Retrieving the cube, she took in the sharp melody within it that felt like a slumbering Giant. The orchestral pieces involved were similar to her recollection of Gideon's formation before new knowledge bloomed within the facets and they expanded on their own.

"I haven't thought about this mapping cube in years. Thanks for the tip. I'll have to check what's recorded," said Amdirlain, putting the cube in the second bag.

"You seem to be your own worst enemy at times, Amdirlain," responded Custodian. "Do at least try to take better care of yourself. You are still precious to Nicholaus, even if you don't see yourself as-"

"I figured that out," interjected Amdirlain, not wanting to get into that discussion.

Amdirlain had finished repairing a hundred thousand of the most eroded prisons before Laodice appeared. She was attired in the same full metal armour with its organic pattern of whorls, but stood only one-hundred ninety centimetres tall, her glacier-blue wings absent.

"Amdirlain, it's good you're sealing those prisoners away," said Laodice.

Custodian said I wouldn't like their request. Will she cut to the chase, or drag it out?

"Is that what you wanted to speak to me about?"

"No, but it would be good if the prisoners don't get loose," said Laodice. "Since Nam guided me to kill several trillion of the sisterhood, she wants you to help her kill a few billion demons."

"The pair of you have some nerve!" spat Amdirlain. "You both got your personal payback, and now you want me to foot the bill?"

Laodice shrugged and, though Amdiralin couldn't detect anything beneath the sealed helmet, she was sure Laodice was smiling. "You're not at least considering helping her?"

Grumbling, Amdiralin shook her head sharply. "What would I get out of it?"

Laodice straightened, placed one hand on her hip, and nodded smugly. "That's a wise question. The true names of hundreds of the most senior members of the sisterhood."

"Why didn't you tell me that you had that sort of information when-"

"I didn't have it. This isn't me hiring you to help her. She's provided me the names to give you if you help her in her war," advised Laodice. "She and a Fallen chatted with the Castellan and pulled the names out of her before passing what was left of her to some infernal enforcers."

Was it someone from the cloister that worked with her?

"You're doing a Dark Goddess’s work for her," critiqued Amdirlain.

"I'm the Aspect of War, not funny memories and bunny slippers. She's a Primordial, and at least honest in her cravings, especially compared to so many demons—and you," retorted Laodice. "Her bloodline has brought forth untold trillions of fierce combatants. What's not to appreciate? You certainly had no compunction dealing with Ebususku or Nam when it suited you. I'm a little more experienced with the vagaries of war and have seen the strangest of alliances bear fruit in times of need."

Despite the validity of Laodice's observation, Amdirlain still had to restrain herself, knowing she was likely being manipulated.

"You manipulated me against Viper," replied Amdirlain.

Laodice turned towards a nearby timer and tapped a finger against her leg. "If you were that concerned about those manipulations, why did you bother to set me free?"

"I might not have liked the stunt you pulled in not being more forthcoming, but I wasn't going to let you remain imprisoned," replied Amdirlain. "Yet you had all that time to study my reactions, and I remember a famous writing on War saying that knowing your enemy and yourself brings certain victory."

"Maybe you should spend more time learning about yourself instead of being fixated on not being Ori," said Laodice. "Or are you simply insecure about how your insignificant past measures up compared to her?"

"Is my need to be my own person annoying to you, or are you trying to yank my chain to get a reaction?" asked Amdirlain calmly.

[Muse’s Insight [S] (104->105)

Note: They all have motives that don't follow your own.]

That includes you, Gideon. I've told you before that I might not hold a grudge for that stunt with the Blood Monk Class, but I've not forgotten it.

"Gideon believes you want to eradicate demons. What's a few billion now?" asked Laodice glibly, and she brought her hands out from her sides.

Look at my open body language; surely I've got nothing to hide. Yeah, pull the other one—it plays jingle bells.

"Why are you interested in her request?" demanded Amdirlain.

Laodice laughed grimly. "You'll destroy millions of demons for a bit of petty revenge, yet won't destroy more on behalf of someone wiser."

She's trying to get under my skin, or at least herd me into reacting.

"I'm not sure about wiser; Why don't you try more combative," replied Amdirlain. "War isn't just about the bloodshed. The strategy that goes into the conflict is just as much a part of it as putting an opponent into the ground. You showed me that with your faux-wiseman act to deflect my focus from Viper's torments. What else is in the area with these demons you hope might get swept up in the fighting?"

"Collateral damage isn't important," said Laodice.

Amdirlain snorted derisively, and her lips twisted into a sneer. "Now I know you're playing games. What you might call ‘collateral damage’ cost me quite a bit in the plinth's appraisal of my position on Redemption's Path."

Waving a hand dismissively, Laodice shook her head. "That's unlikely. You can hear so much further out that you'll be able to identify if there are any mortals present."

"Then just tell me what it is," insisted Amdirlain, and her mouth hardened.

"Maybe I want to see if you'll spot it and remember," rebuffed Laodice. "If you can't, then maybe it's better destroyed."

"Being so insistent about playing this game makes me less inclined to get involved in her war," responded Amdirlain acidly.

"It's not her war—it's her request to see if I can get you to go to war," corrected Laodice.

The roundabout logic in that statement narrowed Amdirlain's gaze. "Someone agreed to something while she was captive with the sisterhood, and now she wants me to break it."

"You can think whatever you want," laughed Laodice. "But now that I've got you thinking about which end of the string is being pulled, I know you'll poke your nose into it. You might not be her, but you are like Ori in more ways than you think."

"I never said I don't have some of the same traits. I've seen enough of her memories to know I can be just as ruthless and work-obsessed as she was," sighed Amdirlain.

"I think you're forgetting a few dozen other traits you have in common, though you express them differently. For example, she was more selective about displays of compassion," said Laodice. "You want everything to be good, but life doesn't work like that. In nearly every ecosystem, a mass of life supports fewer life forms above it. Ori understood that she couldn't save everyone, yet she tried to set up everything so that if beings strived for their goals, they could better themselves."

"There is a system, yes, but they're not told the rules," observed Amdirlain.

"Why should they be told the rules?" snapped Laodice. "They didn't make the realm, and most won't care a jot for its purpose. They’re told enough to know there are routes of progression available. All that telling people the rules achieves is having people look for loopholes to avoid the effort they should put in. Just like you did with the Assassin Class levelling."

What is her game? What good does she think this will do her?

A snippet of music came to mind, bringing forth memories that had Amdirlain smile.

"Absolutely nothing," murmured Amdirlain, repeating a snippet of the lyrics about war aloud to dig at Laodice.

"You won't be able to get this information from other sources," said Laodice.

"You’ve forgotten a few things, Laodice, not that you knew everything about me," replied Amdirlain. "Request denied."

"You will eventually need to get those names from her, even if you don't need them now," argued Laodice. "The longer you keep her waiting, the more she'll make you pay for them."

"Did you make her a promise and find you couldn't deliver? Guess you better tell her you couldn't do it. After all, the longer you keep her waiting, the worse her disappointment will be," replied Amdirlain, and she snorted derisively. "But what's time for you or her, right?"

"Amdirlain, I'm trying to help you get the information you'll need," said Laodice, her tone suddenly reasonable and calm.

She’s behaving erratically to provoke me into a spiral of second-guessing myself. I was only after the information from Naamah to save me time.

"You forget Laodice, I don't need their true names, and I know the use names of hundreds of sisters and have sources that can give me millions more," replied Amdirlain. "Will any of them be the ones that went to the depths? No, that's unlikely, but once I decide to start along that route, I'll keep pulling names from each of them until I find someone who can point me in the right direction. I think I'm past the point where I can easily break most greater succubi on Willpower alone."

Laodice crossed her arms. "Aren't you forgetting the constructs you needed help with?"

"No, the constructs I would have liked help with," corrected Amdirlain. "I'll find a different way."

With Laodice’s disappearance, Custodian giggled; the ringing chimes echoed pleasantly through the columns. "I win two in a row."

"You knew what she was going to ask about?" asked Amdirlain.

"I had a pretty good guess, but I wouldn't interfere if you took that route," replied Custodian. "You were just looking to have your inheritor's celestials benefit from the maze constructs?"

Amdirlain nodded.

The construct appeared in a rush of orchestral pieces as Amdirlain's mind translated the Aspect's will imposed upon reality. It was a sleek humanoid figure that stood two metres tall and was made of gleaming black adamantine, armed with short swords. The figure had no internal mechanisms; instead, the enchantments within the metal lent it a pseudo-life. It was a living metal construct under Custodian's control, and its materials' quality allowed it to approximate three Tier 5 classes and an evolved Knight Class, all at level one hundred.

"Since I'm supposed to be guarding this place, I can't allow myself to be distracted by sending it off anywhere," sighed Custodian.

"At least, not under your control," quipped Amdirlain.

A rude rasping sound emitted from Custodian’s orb. "You're not taking it with you, and I'm sure you've already heard enough to duplicate it for your Sarah's Mineral Control to do the rest."

"She's her own person," replied Amdirlain.

"I'm not saying she isn't. Rather, with her Soul having followed you through so many lifetimes, such love and dedication should at least receive proper acknowledgement," replied Custodian. “It’s not like she didn’t give up a genuine opportunity to become a Deity to keep you company in a hole in the ground.”

“As did Torm,” observed Amdirlain.

“No, he set it aside as he was uncomfortable with the idea. Sarah would have handled it fine,” replied Custodian. “You know, even if he regains all his past life memories, he won’t be Torm. They’ll be a new individual with his memories, who views them from a new perspective no matter how close their personality.”

Amdirlain grumbled. "I’m not waiting around pinning for him. I’ve set any hope of having romance in my life aside; instead, I’ll settle for being the best auntie. Do you have to stick your nose into my business?"

"Ah, yes, because it's obviously a bond she resents. You know your preoccupation with the flesh of a particular form is silly considering everything you've already become since you returned," laughed Custodian. “You should learn to deal with what’s on the inside of an individual.”

"Why don’t you provide Livia with some examples of tenets for deities of protection that you've observed stand the test of time? I’m going to focus on handling these repairs," said Amdirlain sourly, and she returned to work.