Unsubmissive and Unbreedable 1 (Patreon)

Unsubmissive and Unbreedable - or ‘Thanks, but I am not interested in being part of that Dead Meme, Cynder!’ (Spyro, Human!SI)

I could tell it was going to be one of those ‘unique’ days when I woke up somewhere that was not my bed and with a circumstance that would soon see me flee the scene with a dragon after my ass.

This first sentence sounds preposterous, I know, but I didn’t get much of a chance to understand it myself at a first glance when… I just woke up in some random clearing, quite far from home, with something large and menacing sniffing at my clothes. Nostrils flaring, the snout of the large scaled thing just carefully scanned my body.

I was belly up, so my groin was within reach. This detail may not seem significant, but considering how drawn that snout was in releasing steamy and hot air over my crotch suggested it actually was.

This last thing had me twitch a fair bit, and the winged lizard noticed I was awake. A dragon, and not just a simple dragon. Dark scales, with a red-scaled belly and details… yeah, this is Cynder before she got saved by Spyro.

Ah, Spyro the Dragon… a series I had long left out of my brain with how disappointing things have been in recent years and- I have a feeling this is quite bad. Not just because of who this character was, her current affiliations too were not too worrisome- it was what she was doing that had me tense up a fair bit.

“You are awake.”

There was no surprise or delight, only flat affirmation in her voice. At this stage, Cynder was a stoic villain of the classic kind. Not much of the ‘big bad’, but the second-in-command within the hierarchy she observed under Malefor.

If I remember correctly, her boss was sealed away and he has been as such for a long time while she had been working with what was left of his army to get him out of his imprisonment.

…I am sure this was not part of any map exploreable in the game she debuted in. I was in uncharted territory, both on a personal and meta experience. Escaping now was not feasible so…

Time for some diplomatic BS.

“H-Hi.”

“Hello, ape. Or whatever you are.”

“Human.”

She blinked, a curious glint flashing through her slit eyes. “Hu… man. Interesting.”

“...”

“Say, human, are you the only one around? Do you have a… mate around?”

I don’t like where this is going.

“It’s just… me.”

“And who is ‘me’?”

Pushy much, aren’t ya?

“John. John Bukharin.”

“Two names?”

“First name and family name,” I replied as curtly as she was asking any questions.

It seemed like she preferred it this way and, at this point, going against her was bad for myself. I would soon have a reason to start plotting my escape as she laid out the current circumstance.

“Well, John, I can’t help but see that a lone human stumbles in this clearing I was checking. Your smell being… pleasant. I would like to claim you.”

Oh.

“As in-”

“Mate with you,” Cynder elaborated, sounding quite ‘frustrated’ about it. “After all, it’s only fair for me to claim a submissive and breedable male.”

…She did not. She just didn’t dare to use a dead meme to justify her ‘muh prey, muh sex toy’ plot. Oh hell nope!

Still, I couldn’t tell her that to her face. Not without warranting death. I had to get out as, with all due respect, I wasn’t going to let a dragon dom-fuck me into a broken pelvis situation.

“W-Well, that sounds like an honor. I am but a lowly-”

“You smell good, I care not what you are,” The dragon interjected strongly, claws reaching and taking hold of my clothes a bit too tightly.

“S-Sti-Still!” I let out a bit of a shrill yelp as she was close to tearing my pants apart. It was enough to let her draw another pause. “If you want to m-mate me, at least respect my tradition- it’s a simple one, really!”

“...Which is?”

“Find me ten apples.”

She blinked, pulling away for a moment just to glance at me. “Why ten?”

“T-The number of times I would go with you, rounds and… uh… the eggs I would give you!”

…

“Ten eggs is preposterous for a mere dragon to accomplish, and you, a little ape-like thing, seek to provide me with so many?”

“...Yeah.”

…

“I think I will stick with the rounds you can provide. I will be back… soon~.”

The extra purring at the end of that promise sent an awkward jolt down my spine. She even had the balls to lean down to lick my cheek in a playful manner before taking off and flying around to find the apples.

She wasn’t straying too far, her attention shifting to where I was while keeping near to the clearing itself. I didn’t move at first. I had some time to do something essential before getting the fuck out of there and… that was thinking of where to go. Two options tempted me a fair bit, a distant entrance to the forest that led North and towards a tall mountain, the other being closer to where I was and led deep in the forest.

Option 1 would expose me for an early catch, but, if pulled correctly, allow me to find an hiding spot in the many potential caves of the mountain that could take me underground and thus away from Cynder’s chance to catch me.

Option 2 was optimal in the first run, but extremely ‘dubious’ in the ensuing hiding process. The forest looked to be thick enough to not be passable by large individuals such as the current Cynder, but it was… flammable. She didn’t sound in the mood to kill me, but flames can help in clearing a path to where I am- and her claws could easily tore the trees if needed.

While Option 1 seemed the most tantalizing, I realized that it was also an option Cynder may be considering herself while pondering on what kind of escape plan I may be concocted. An idiot she was not, but she was willing to clearly play a ‘game’ to get a nice reward.

So, despite some internal doubts on the matter, I stood up, turned to the path leading to the forest and ran as my life depended on it. A shift in the air, the pick up of pressure all around me made me realize my life was genuinely in peril.

Cynder noticed my attempt early on, wings flapping fast and angrily as she rushed as swiftly as possible to get to me. Much to her dismay and my growing hope, she failed to get to me in time as I bolted through the muddy path of the forest, the trees still creating some distraction for her to deal with while I kept on running.

Adrenaline was pumping through my whole body, my eyes turning left and right to pick up obstacles and potential paths to take to further delve into the forest and… I had a chance to hide away in a rather convenient muddy pond nearby. I fetched a large leaf on the path, turned to the unpleasant water and dipped most of my body inside in it.

I was wearing my PJs at the time, no devices on me, so I didn’t risk any electrocution or the grand loss of important clothes to me. I refrained from holding my breath, knowing that it was easier to just hide my head with the leaf rather than risk drowning while escaping Cynder.

From the way she first reacted to my ‘scent’, I have a feeling it was more channeled around my sweat. With most of my body submerged, and my short-haired self lacking enough hair to ‘sponge’ the smell, I expected the small lake’s stench to overrule it.

And from what I could hear as the dragon continued her destructive path to try and catch up to me only for said wrath to carry her well away from where I was, I was successful in that effort.

I still didn’t leave the muddy lake yet. It was relatively warm, so I didn’t think of getting sick in lingering there for a moment to contemplate my situation.

I am in a fictional world where dragons are a thing, with the classic good vs. evil trope, and the second by power villain of the first game of the new timeline is trying to hunt me down for some pelvis-breaking snu-snu.

This is… bad.

Even worse was that I couldn’t think of where to go just yet. This place was utterly unfamiliar to me, which meant I would have to explore it, hoping to find a shelter while also dodging any potential encounter with Cynder.

This is just not my day, or week from the looks of it.