Born Again (Patreon)

Wow. This is the place it all started. I had a friend ask me today, why nudes? I've had different presentations of this question over recent years. Here was my response today:

"Why do I always shoot nudes? I’m a nudist. I was born naked, as we all were, and I grew up in a very free environment. My parents were very liberal, evolved hippies, who took my brother and I to places in nature of extreme beauty... Wilbur hot springs in California, St. John virgin island, Acadia national park in Maine. We spent time in the woods every summer, living off the land, camping, being one with nature, and beautiful places where clothing was always optional. My mother chose not to have television growing up, so instead, when I was bored as a child, she would give me art materials to play with. Because of this, art has always been my therapy, my go to, background, and passion. During University, I went through a period of depression and soul-searching, as most humans do. From this experience, I found myself signing up and taking fine Art photography classes, which became my therapy as a young adult. My background for my studies was in communications, marketing, advertising, public relations, graphic design, typography, etc... My aesthetic at the time gravitated toward fashion, where I would take photos of people with clothing, fabrics, lingerie etc. During my critiques in the photography classes I was taking at Elon University, my professor and many of the students would ask questions about my choice in clothing and the way that the models were posing. I realized that the work that I was producing was contributing to the stereotypical standards of beauty that I so strongly despise in our society. At this time I also had an internship with a fashion photographer in Boston during the summer of my sophomore or junior year at college. After this experience of editing down very slender girls to be even skinnier for the sake of fashion and advertisements, I realized that this was not for me. I took my first self-portrait nudes in nature photograph in Lubec, Maine, the land that I’d been going to each summer with my family since I was born, the place where my brother learned to walk, the place where I go canoeing with my dad at sunrise to catch scallops that we later cook over the fire for meals. Taking these self-portraits was an extremely healing experience for me. Of course at first it was a bit scary, just doing something different,feeling so exposed. I remember my dear friends, my dear photography professor’s, who I spoke with daily at school as I stayed after class to perfect my prints and edits. One day when I was frustrated after class, talking with Ken Hassel about my quandary around the fashion industry and my difficulty defending my work in critiques, he asked my if I’d ever thought about shooting nudes. I took a breath, and thought for a moment, and realized that I hadn’t thought about that before, but that it may be both fun and feasible given my background with nudity as a child... freedom in the body... one with nature. So that summer, during college, when I was in Maine with my family, I took my first nude photographs in nature. I overlayed these images with photos of clouds I took out of airplane windows, to create a surreal reality. I was in a very high-level religion class at the time called comparative mysticism, I was also really close with LD Russell the religion professor at Elon. I wanted the narrative of my work to represent the space between heaven and earth, emphasizing oneness in all things. The feedback that I received on this series along with the positive feedback that I received from my past work, including comments from my professor that I was more driven and successful than almost all of the former photography majors, gave me great encouragement to start taking this more seriously, to continue my work and to take it to the next level. At this point I started going to conferences around the country called SPE (society for photographic education), where I got scholarships and participated in critique sessions with industry professionals. At these conferences I got amazing feedback and encouragement to continue what I started in school, which primarily consisted of my nude photography in nature. Not only was this a very therapeutic and healing journey for me, but I also started seeing the professional side of the industry. From this point on, I couldn’t stop producing work. It was addicting. To be naked in nature, alone, with friends, it was a healing experience for all of us, and still is. When I first moved to New York, I started meeting people who were interested in my art. I made my first sales. Without meaning to, I became an artist. I guess I was always an artist, we all are, but my therapy, my passion, became my reality. So many people have told me to pick one thing and do it well. I chose this. Nude photography in nature is what I do, it is the back bone, the essential, primary component to my work. Over the years I have rediscovered my passion for mixed media, while also discovering my love for performance art. I now implement all of these methods of expression into my work. Nudity in nature is the thread within everything I do. It represents our inherent connection to the earth for me, something that I truly believe is the most important part of our existence. I know that it is ironic that I live in New York City, while I’m so obsessed with nature, and while my work all deals with concepts of nature. But right now I need to be here to make connections and to further my career in the arts. However my dream, someday, hopefully someday soon, is to just have a small home base/ studio here in the city, and have the means to travels to different national parks and lands around the world. I want to photograph people, including myself, in all types of landscapes, with wild animals. I want to remind us of, what I believe to be the most important thing right now, mother earth. She is on fire, the world is on fire, trees are burning everywhere, grass, plants, oceans, animals, humans. When I travel to Colorado, to California, I can see the burns on her skin. We are all suffering. My photographs of nude humans in nature serve as a reminder to both myself and to my viewers of the importance of our land, and our symbiotic relationship that we have with Mother Earth. We are born wild. We are the earth."

[This series was taken in Lubec, Maine in the Summer of 2015, five years ago. I have been going to Lubec since I was born. This is where I took my first nude in nature series, circa 2012. During the year of 2015, I went back to this location, with my family and with a friend who I was living with at the time, Kahil. As you can see, all of these images are taken from far away. My self esteem was very low at this time. I was drinking way too much alcohol, trying to ignore my reality instead of admitting my flaws, fears and creating a new one. It feels so good to look back at these and see the beauty. To find new love in old images... even if they were taken during a dark time. I was still unsure of who I was, still seeking confidence from external sources, still finding my voice. After seeing so many far away shots that I took with my tripod, I'm remembering my love of overlays and landscapes. So much to come. So many opportunities in front of me. So much to make, create, and share. Thank you universe, for having my back, for guiding me back to the light, where I have to be. Thank you.]